February 18, 2009

Racing Bailout Plan: GM to run same car in all series.

As part of its viability plan unveiled yesterday, GM's racing division announced dramatic cost savings achieved by running a NASCAR platform in all racing series across the globe.

"It's a no-brainer really..." said GM spokesman Lazarus K Pocketslop. " Not only are the cost savings obvious but we are promoting our green credentials by recycling the same body and simply apply different stickers to simulate different brands, models and aero setups".

Newly named global team "czar" and former ice racing celebrity Jasper Bullbanger indicated Danica Patrick and Scott Speed would be tapped as sole drivers and comply with the "Buy American" provision of the bailout.

The new GM Global Racing Platform, seen here testing in a combination endurance racing/tarmac rally form, is expected to debut in late 2009 and be powered by leftover Hummer, Saturn and Saab motors.

(photo: Roberto Blank)



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5 comments:

  1. Is this actually real? It seems way too stupid to be real...

    "we are promoting our green credentials by recycling the same body and simply apply different stickers to simulate different brands, models and aero setups".

    Seriously?!?! Different stickers?!?! It has to be fake.

    ReplyDelete
  2. please god, no! Isnt there enough NASCRAP already?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Something tells me the axis guys are getting bored.

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  4. Lazarus K Pocketslop

    Brilliant ... have you been reading Hunter Thompson again?

    ReplyDelete
  5. This is a joke, right?? Two people by the names of "pocketslop" (GM spokesperson)and "bullbanger" (ice racing celebrity) came up with this plan. Plus, Danica Patrick and Scott Sharp will be the only drivers for all the racing venues??? Does this mean there will be a full wrap Corvette C6R decal on a NASCAR platform???

    I'm trading in my 2008 Equinox for a Prius.

    ReplyDelete

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